The Longest Day of My Life: Part One
My husband’s been working non-stop for the past two weeks. Which, is awesome because it means he has a job.
But, I won’t lie. It’s been exhausting not having my more-mature half around.
These boys, they’ll run you ragged. People do it everyday, though, so I won’t complain (anymore).
He left to work early yesterday morning, with me wrapped around his leg crying and pleading with him.
Take me with you. Don’t leave me with them. They are evil.
He shook his leg a few times, flicked me like a bug, and was off.
Then, right on cue, it started pouring rain.
Luca was begging to go outside and “check the weather.” I was a total stick in the mud about it for like two minutes, until I remembered how much fun is to play in the rain.
I told them to have at it and the rain dance began.
Initially, Leo was very skeptical of the buckets of water falling from the sky, choosing to observe his big brother a bit before getting his own feet wet.
Then, he slipped and fell on his tiny ass.
And, Luca was all, “Come on, dude. Don’t be such a baby. Man up.”
That’s when I remembered the raincoats and boots we all had.
And when they remembered the bald spot in our yard and were all like sweet, mud!
The sky began to rumble, telling us it was time to head in and give my dog a xanax, her Thunder Shirt, and some boob-pillow time.
I made the boys some train tracks, so they could play with them for two minutes before yelling, “I’m sooooo bored.”
Just as I’d started to think, “Man, this day is going beautifully and who even needs a god damn man anyway?” the universe laughed loudly, waved it’s finger back and forth and said, “Not so fast, oh confident one.”
And, at 0-something-hundred-i-don’t-know-how-the-fuck-to-read-military-time hours, the longest day of my life began.
Trigger warning: If you’re easily offended by plumbing issues, or snail and slug invasions, you might want to skip tomorrow’s post.